And The Wolf Shall Lie Down With A Bottle of Budweiser

And The Wolf Shall Lie Down With A Bottle of Budweiser


Well some group is actually upset with a Super Bowl ad by Budweiser for showing a wolf approach a puppy in a threatening manner.

The group is asking people to call Budweiser and ask them to withdraw that part of the ad before this Sunday's Super Bowl saying that wolves already receive enough bad PR.


I wonder if we'll hear this news story on the radio soon:


A rabid animal rights activist was so angry when he heard about the ad, he pulled his truck over to call Budweiser and demand they withdraw that portion of the ad.
When he finished talking on the phone,  he looked into the back of the cab of his truck and found a wolf had just eaten the puppy dog in the back he was bringing home to surprise his children.


Meanwhile in other news, a pro-shark group is demanding that Turner Classic Movies stop showing the 1975 Steven Spielberg film Jaws that shows sharks eating humans saying that sharks receive enough bad PR already.

Is AI (Artificial Intelligence) A Threat To Humanity? -A News Bulletin

Is AI (Artificial Intelligence) A Threat To Humanity? - A News Bulletin



Radio news announcer:  In a statement released today, Microsoft said that "Artificial Intelligence will not kill us."
This bulletin just in... Microsoft owner Bill Gates has been found strangled by his robot butler after Gates refused to grant the robotic valet a night off for a date with a robotic lookalike of Shakira...

The Roman Emperor Caligula: A Poem

The Roman Emperor Caligula:  A Poem


In Ancient Rome, Caligula was quite the chap
Certain Senators thought he was full of crap
particularly when to the Senate a horse he named
and the Senate's marble floor was soon brownly framed
of course it was only the back end of the horse that Caligula had appointed
because he thought that part most resembled Rome's "honourable men" so anointed.
Caligula dressed in public as Mercury, Venus and Apollo
for he thought he was more than a jolly good fellow
He thought of himself as a living god
as he once boasted to his Uncle Claud
He soon started calling himself the Great and Noble Jupiter
and shoved up a Patrician's ass an arrow from statue of Cupid-ter
He soon started removing heads from statues of the gods of Rome
and replaced them with heads of facial features- his own
Caligula was really starting to become quite mad
and many started to think him a cad
When he announced to the Senate in 40 AD
that he would be leaving Rome permanently
and moving the Imperial capital to Alexandria to be worshipped as a living god
The Praetorian Guard had finally had had enough of this fraud
And on the 24th of January 41 AD they bumped him off
And the Emperor Caligula died with less than a divine cough.



-A poem written by Christopher
 Saturday January 24th 2015
 on the anniversary of The Emperor
 Caligula's assassination.


Sent from my iPhone

Strangers In Black and White: A Poem

Strangers In Black and White:  A Poem


A dark night in black and white
strangers down at the dock by the waterfront
he a disgraced ex-boxer who threw a fight
She a club singer who lost her voice due to illness
She thinks of ending her life
He's trying to find his
They meet
These strangers in the night
They connect
which actually few strangers do
Most strangers meet and pass
like ships in the night.
They go to his home
get jobs in the same restaurant
and slowly fall in love
But while hoping for a brighter future
both their pasts catch up with them.
The gangsters who own the cabaret
where once she sang
find her
and return the canary
to her cage
however gilded and glitzy it might be
it's still a cage.
As for the boxer who thought his brother had left for a ranch in Brazil
it turns out he never made it to Brazil
And so dreams become nightmares
Hopes that once were beacons of light
become like flashing signs of neon
They light up
only to turn dark again.
And so they become once more
strangers in black and white
like the film on which their story is told
like their lives in which the darkness of the past
seeks to engulf the potential bright light of the future
in that never ending conflict that is the present.
Strangers in black and white
a lot like you and I
who allow colour to distract us
and not see the light against shadow
and the shadow against light
that dance all around us.



-A poem written by Christopher
 Wednesday January 21st 2015
 inspired by having watched the
 1957 Japanese noir film
 I Am Waiting
 on Turner Classic Movies
 a few nights before.


Sent from my iPhone

Haiku About Alan Turing

Haiku About Alan Turing


Take Alan Turing
it took an enigma to
crack an enigma

Haiku About Kim Kardashian

Haiku About Kim Kardashian


Kim Kardashian
tried to break Net by making
an ass of herself

Haiku About The Seattle Seahawks

Haiku About The Seattle Seahawks


Seattle Seahawks
dynasty in the making?
see at Super Bowl

Haiku About Jekyll and Hyde

Haiku About Jekyll and Hyde


Henry and Edward
good doc, take potion, bad jock
with nowhere to Hyde

Haiku About Zombie Apocalypse (Those Living Dead Creatures Who Feed On Human Brains)

Haiku About Zombie Apocalypse (Those Living Dead Creatures Who Feed On Human Brains)


Zombie on island
with Kim Kardashian so he
died of starvation

Haiku About Perry Mason

Haiku About Perry Mason


Yes Perry Mason
in court makes mincemeat out of
Hamilton Burger

Haiku About The Shadow of Old Time Radio Fame

Haiku About The Shadow of Old Time Radio Fame



Young Lamont Cranston
man about town knows men's hearts
casts a long shadow

Scottish Laddies: A Poem

Scottish Laddies:  A Poem


There were some Scottish laddies
some might think they were baddies
they drank together
and stank together
and bathed together in highland stream
underneath a bright moon beam
they played golf in the heather
whatever the weather
and ate their porridge
and fought King George
they drank many a whiskey
and chased lassies frisky
then one day one of them announced he'd wed
an aghast buddy said, "What? And join the ranks of the living dead?"
But the man insisted he'd fallen in love
he swore by the heavens above
and so the man did indeed wed
but one of his buddies said,
"I'll bet you a dozen gold coins
that what's between your loins
will not be able to perform on your wedding night
and your bride will die bored rather than from fright."
The man accepted the bet
just as the sun set
and the voyeur in the group
while eating Scots broth soup
said, "I can see where this is leading
so I'll watch the proceeding
and being a neutral party
I swear by Wallace's brave hearty
that I'll truthfully tell what unfolds
whether his performance outshines the marigolds
and I'll play my favourite musical instrument if he performs the deed
and if he performs not, not a single note will be heard- blank like his seed."
So it was agreed.
Then came the wedding night
and in the moonlight
the groom's friend who made the bet
stood on a hill after sunset
and hoped for the sweet sounds of silence by the dawn's early light
when would end the groom's wedding night
and at day break the groom's friend waited for a sound
and then as cock crew, he hit the ground
and though his promise must be kept
the thrifty Scotsman still wept,
"A drum, a drum,
MacBeth doth come."


-A poem written by Christopher
 Monday January 12th 2015.


Sent from my iPhone

The Dancing Dragon: A Poem

The Dancing Dragon:  A Poem


The dragon danced
with ants down his pants
and that's why he danced
when you've got the itch
then life is a bitch
all you want to do is scratch
with another to match
The Emperor Wu watched the dragon dance
seeing it quite by chance
and was so impressed
he ordered his courtiers dressed
in the costume of a dragon
and jumping off the wagon
would dance through the streets of Beijing
where there was no peeking
under the dancing dragon's costume bold
emblazoned in bright colours of red and gold
so the tradition continues each Lunar New Year
where the dragon dances to quite a loud cheer.



-A poem written by Christopher
 Sunday January 11th 2015.

Haiku About Edgar Allan Poe

Haiku About Edgar Allan Poe


-written by Christopher
 Saturday January 10th
 2015.


Edgar Allan Poe
went raven mad for lost love
Lenore- tell-tale heart

Haiku About Darth Vader

Haiku About Darth Vader

-written by Christopher
 Friday January 9th
 2015.

Anakin skywalks
on over to the dark side
bought helmet to match

Haikus About Charlie Hebdo Massacre

Haikus About Charlie Hebdo Massacre

So Jonathan Swift
made modest proposal that
led to no killings

Now Mister Swift's ghost
travels to Paris and says
oui je suis Charlie

Haiku For Sherlock Holmes' 161st Birthday

Haiku For Sherlock Holmes'   161st Birthday

-written by Christopher
 Tuesday January 6th
 2015.


Baker Street's Sherlock
Two- two- one Bee the door to
his great adventures

Haiku About Hamlet's Father's Ghost

Haiku About Hamlet's Father's Ghost

-written by Christopher
 Monday January 5th
 2015.


Hamlet's father's ghost
seeks Cinnamon Danish bun
atop Elsinore

Haiku About King Arthur and The Mists of Avalon

Haiku About King Arthur and The Mists of Avalon

-written by Christopher
 Sunday January 4th
 2015.


Mists of Avalon
where the mighty Arthur sleeps
wake the needed King

Haiku About The Goal of Many To Climb Mount Everest

Haiku About The Goal of Many To Climb Mount Everest


To climb Everest
the goal as Hillary's ghost
says Been there, done that

Haiku About The Tree In Winter

Haiku About The Tree In Winter

- written by Christopher
  Friday January 2nd
  2015.



The tree in winter
stands desolate and forlorn
yet will bloom in spring

Three Surefire Ways To Keep Your New Year's Resolutions This Year

Three Surefire Ways To Keep Your New Year's Resolutions This Year



#1.  Don't make any New Year's resolutions.


#2.  Don't make any New Year's resolutions.



And...


#3.  Don't make any New Year's resolutions.



-Advice written by Christopher
 Thursday January 1st 2015.